Thursday, June 27, 2013

UNDONE DOMA

Twice married: the first time in Saratoga Springs in 1997, the second in Toronto, Canada, in 2005 - the same day Parliament extended gay marriage to all provinces and territories. Interestingly and unexpectedly, the Canadian Broadcasting Network was at the court and interviewed us and our hosts, which landed everyone on the evening news. Oh, that was fun! The piece of paper? It wound up obtaining health benefits for Mr. Husband at the opera since New York State was recognizing gay marriage but not performing them until 2011. There are Rites, and then there are Rights. Not the same thing, of course, their intersection - the first ceremony being a Buddhist one - life-changing. 

So it was with great anticipation that we heard the news yesterday morning. I walked into the bedroom where Mr. Husband was online and said: "You get my Social Security, we can file taxes together, and we can inherit each other's property!" You know: the stuff that everyone else has - and in some cases - takes for granted. But you can't do that when you don't have any rights; can't inherit without cutting off your arm to pay the IRS, take care of each other without a blizzard of paper that can still be ignored, and are litigated against by greedy bastards who take your surviving partner for all they are worth. 

Those days are over in 13 states anyway. Their number will grow; pitched battle, politics being local, the Supremes making it near Constitutional: there is no going back because we are equal under the law. 

Thank you, Edie Windsor! 



4 comments:

  1. Dear Daniel, Congratulations. This is such a promising news! I'm very happy for you and your husband (I find the word, partner, strange. It's like referring to a colleague in a law firm). I'm only hoping that Scotland would soon to follow your country's example. Here's hoping!!

    Have a good evening.

    Best wishes, ASD.

    PS. It's always wonderful to read your writings. I adore your list of favourites on the right hand side of your page. You've got an impeccable taste!!

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    1. Thanks you for stopping by, ASD. Yes- the word partner is strange: never like it, found it odd and off-putting. There is a lot of work to do on both sides of the Pond, and I hope- like you- that Scotland will legalize matters sooner rather than later! Wishing you all the best- Daniel

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    1. Thank you, ArchitectDesign! What a parade it is going to be here in Gotham on Sunday!

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